Can exaggerated feminism be the cause of MAP-feelings?

[Kofola Nizozemi]

Ahoj a jak se mate tento den?

Here is the west, western Europe and the crazy Anglosaxon world, it looks like feminism went complete crazy.
As I am in favor of the first wave of feminism in western world in the 1920's, it looks like the second wave in the '80's went complete nuts. It is more about hating men, then it is about for equality for women and men.
Soviet-feminism was really about liberating women and become equal in rights to men, however as always here in the west things always go extreme. I looks like feminism in Czech Republic is not as insane as in the west, where everywhere nowadays is 'metoo' and just for looking at a woman you can get into troubles. With the internet things get only more hysterical.
Your former president Milos Zeman, rightfully said that he did not want to have things ugly western things like 'metoo' hysteria in his country, Women also seem to be more decent and educated in Czech Republics, Slovakia, Poland and Magyarozag, Ukraina and Russia and less hysterical and less men-hating.

So I just wonder, coming to on-topic, can MAP-feelings not come from the fact that is a lot of women are becoming a complete nut-head and menhating hysterical human beings that this is ofcourse not attractive to men and therefore maybe men become gay or MAP.
The hypocritical part of women in the west these days is that women really hate MAP's, even if you do not do anything with your feelings, just for having these feelings, they hate us, but maybe they, the hysterical feminists of the second wave of feminism in the western world (so not including the former Warsawa-pact) are maybe the cause, of one of the causes of people with MAP-feelings?

Too bad there are no fora anylonger in western world about being MAP, or thinking I am a MAP (maybe I am just normal heterosexual, but I am too much traumatised by radical feminism, as things are really awfull and ugly here in the west, be happy you do not live here but in a normal country with normal people like Czech or Slovakia). I would like to discuss this also with western people.
I do not know how awfull and ugly feminism became in Czech or Slovak, women look pretty normal to me in Czech. I even think if I was born in Russia or the Sovjet Union, I would have been married now, have children, have a normal job. Not this crazy life I have to undergo now in the Netherlands.

As being a MAP (or thinking I am) therefore I am excluded from any type of psychological help, I have to figure out everything by myself. No psychiater in the west is going to even listen to you if you identify as a MAP. Forget about any type of help. Also not from policie if people beat you up. No.help.whatsoever.
None.

So I try to figure out everything myself. I strongly believe in God, so I will not commit suicide. I will face everything I have to face and togther with the Help of God and some friends who understand and no support from state, I try to be my own psychiater (without medication, but just healthy food and healthy lifestyle).

I just want to know what you think? Can toxic feminism - so feminism of the crazy western world a world that seems to be in decline morally - be the cause or one of the cause of men with MAP-feelings?

Just wondering.

I hope I am allowed to be politically incorrect here, I guess most Czech and Slovaks do not like this stupid politically correctness of the west anyway. And I agree with you!
Na zdravi!
Na shledanou!
Do vidzenia!

Cau!

[podivin]

I just want to know what you think? Can toxic feminism - so feminism of the crazy western world a world that seems to be in decline morally - be the cause or one of the cause of men with MAP-feelings?

Hello Kofola,

I don't believe, toxic feminism could create MAP. But I can believe, that feminism could create predators. That men want to only have sex with a women, but the women can now better say "no" to just ONS and then the men just use children to have only sex without building real relation.

But I think it is something different what pedofiles want (I mean pedofiles without any other psychic disorder as sadism, sexual agression, loss of empathy, etc). I would like to build relation with girls, not for sex, but because I love them and I want to live with them as a partner and I want to be with them everyday (of course only if they feel and want the same thing).

[Kofola Nizozemi]

Dobre vecer!

Diky for your reply.

I do not care much about sex. For me sex is not important, I am more into being friends I guess with a girl or a woman.

Maybe like you indeed.

Sex does not seem much fun to me, I am maybe more a sexual.

I just try to figure out why I feel so much attraction towards young girls, why they make me smile, why I feel butterflies in my stomach, just by being by them. I do not need sex.

So it is just a question. Can radical feminisme - in Czech you do not have these radical things, Czechs seem to be quiet peacefull people to me, be the cause of men becoming gay or MAP?
But maybe it is not the case.

Too bad no psychiater here in crazy Nizozemi seem to be willing to talk about the subject. Radical hysterical American and Anglosaxon feminism might be the cause. The Netherlands is too close to England and too far away from God.

[podivin]

Hello Kofola,

I did not want to tell, that you want just sex. I mean the predators want and they abuse children to get only sex easy.

I do not want to say, that I like sex. I don't like sex as just game or fun or to kill the time if one is bored. I want to make a love with the woman who I love and her loves me. But only if she want to. I cannot force any woman to have sex, even I have not forced my wife to sex. But I have sexual fesire/urge, but luckily I have learnt the masturbation as pre school kid, so I don't need to abuse/molest other.

So with girls it's same by me as by you. I feel love, nice feeling in the chest without any thoughts about sexual contact. Of course, later, when I am alone, I have erotic fantasies about girls, but even then it's as about loving us together as just using girl as erotic toy.


Maybe you could find some czech sexuologist, who understand and accept pedofiles and can speak english. But you had to pay it yourself, if you pay no health insurance in CZ.

Have a nice day.

[Sucré]

You know... I'd like to recommend you to actually try listening to what people are saying. Or like, to learn a bit more about the things and people you hate. You might find out that those weird people who seemed to be just, insane, you know, actually have a point, some reasoning behind their actions. Maybe they are wrong, maybe you'll disagree with them, maybe they just believe in blatant lies, but, it's always better to do that instead of just believing in strawmen. Like, the man-hating feminist is, well, barely more than a stereotype about as real world relevance as the trans-woman serial killer or the ice cream selling pedo child predator. Feminists have always been portrayed as that, it's as old as old as feminism itself.
It's a simple matter of: how many people did actually get into trouble for just looking at women? Isn't the opposite, like, the vast majority of people who outright sexually abuse women -not- getting into trouble true? We have data on that. Most woman hate men, which makes men gay or pedophiles.. like, really?

After all, isn't this, kind of, what this whole thing with people refusing to understand pedophiles is all about?

*oh my god, is actually an emoji on this site... That actually makes me pretty disappointed*

Anyway, have you tried some of the links here? https://blog.mapsupport.club/msc/support-resources
Since you mention that there are no places like this forum there, at least the MAP support club itself seems to be an English-language version of a safe chatroom, and there are also some Dutch sites there - which i obviously don't know anything about, but i hope that they could provide some help. I think i saw some people redirected to um.. MAP-friendly therapists here, so hopefully one of those sites could provide some contact info regarding therapists in Netherlands?

[Bouře]

Hi Kofola!

First of all, it is important to understand what feminism is. Feminism is an ideology that seeks equality between the sexes, which means that it fights for women's rights as well as (and many people don't realize this) men's rights. For example, according to this ideology, men should not be shamed for crying or be shamed for doing jobs that "originally belong to women." There are about 4 waves of feminism, and feminism has evolved a lot. First it was pushing for women's suffrage, to today where sexual violence is being pointed out. The current wave you are probably criticizing is trying to point out that sexual violence against women, and men, is not okay.

I do not know what the situation is with feminism in the Netherlands, but the fourth wave is also very important, because sexual violence is indeed very hurtful. But if you mean women who call themselves feminists, yet hate all men, get upset about almost everything and are generally extremist, insults someone, no those are not feminists. They're either really stupid or they don't understand what feminism is about. I'm sure they are, but they're not the majority. Most feminists are very sensible women.

The truth is that in the Czech Republic, sexual violence against women, men and sometimes children is downplayed a lot. If you look at some discussions of newspaper articles about rape, you often read comments like "it was her own fault", "it was just bad sex", "it didn't happen that much" or "why did she report it? All she did was hurt herself, her children and tear her family apart" and other comments that downplay rape and domestic violence and blame the victim (victimblaming). This is not just on the internet, but in society in general. The vast majority of women do not go to report rape. Only 5%. Why? They are afraid of the reaction of their family, their neighbourhood and how they will be treated by the police or the courts. Unfortunately, even the courts downplay such acts. Possession of large amounts of marijuana here often gets you a bigger sentence than rape, which is sad in itself... About half of the reported rapes here end in suspended sentences, and often more brutal acts, and child abuse gets suspended sentences even more often! Is that okay? Is it okay for perpetrators of such acts to get away with this behavior? It even pays off for them... Many people here don't realize how hurtful these heinous acts are.... Even in the justice system.

The countries you named aren't going to be the best at educating people about feminism either, and certainly not Poland. Women's rights are very much denied there and there are even "LGBT+ free" zones being created. As far as I know, they don't like paedophiles much there either, and they confuse the meaning of paedophile and sexual predator even more than here in the Czech Republic. In Slovakia they will also be even worse off than here in the Czech Republic. I have part of my family from Slovakia and until recently women were treated as something less than men. The man was the decision maker and the woman was supposed to be the one obedient and faithful to her husband... At least in the smaller villages. When a relative of mine from Slovakia bought a radio about 15 years ago, she was happy about it, but had to go and return it in the end because "Mr. alpha male and head of the family" roared and scolded her some more.

Very few people like Miloš Zeman nowadays. He's a boor who could insult anyone he could, he was rude... No, he really wasn't the best president and he didn't represent our country in the best way. I'm glad for the new president, Peter Pavel. I believe he will represent our country well as well as defend our interests and unite rather than divide.

I can assure you that neither MAP nor gay feelings are definitely born out of feminism, even the extremist "feminism" kind. It's just possible that if someone was at least partially attracted to the same sex or children before, they may have begun to feel more affection (or rather, be more aware of it) if they were surrounded by a bad social bubble.

I'm sure there is help and therapists in your country. I recently came across a Dutch project for paedophiles. Here they have a site where there is not only professional help but also chat. I believe you will find help and support there.

https://pedofilie.nl/

► Ukázat spoiler

Nedokázala bych takový text napsat v angličtině, tak jsem ho napsala v češtině a dala do překladače. Kdyby to náhodou vyhodilo nějaký nesmysl, do spoileru jsem dala původní text.


Ahoj Kofolo!

V první řadě je důležité si říct, co je to feminismus. Feminismus je ideologie snažící se o rovnost mezi pohlavími, což znamená, že bojuje jak za ženská práva, tak i (a to si mnoho lidí neuvědomuje) ta mužská. Podle této ideologie by třeba muži neměli být zahanbováni za to, že pláčou, nebo být zahanbování, že dělají práce, které "původně patří ženám". Těch vln feminismu jsou asi 4 a feminismus se hodně rozvíjel. Nejdříve se snažil o volební právo žen, až po dnešek, kdy se poukazuje na sexuální násilí. Ta dnešní vlna, kterou pravděpodobně kritizuješ se snaží poukázat na to, že sexuální násilí na ženách, ale i mužích není v pořádku.

Nevím, jak je to s feminismem u vás v Nizozemsku, avšak i ta čtvrtá vlna je velmi důležitá, protože sexuální násilí je skutečně velmi zraňující. Pokud máš ale na mysli ženy, které si říkají feministky, přitom nenávidí všechny muže, skoro všechno je naštve a jsou celkově extrémistické a někomu nadávají, ne tohle nejsou feministky. Jsou buď hodně hloupé, nebo nepochopily, o čem je feminismus. Určitě takové jsou ale není jich většina. Většina feministek jsou velmi rozumné ženy.

Pravdou je, že u nás v Česku se hodně bagatelizuje sexuální násilí a to jak na ženách, mužích tak občas i dětech. Když se koukneš do nějakých diskusí novinových článků, kde se píše o znásilnění, často tam čteš komentáře typu "mohla si za to sama", "vždyť to byl jen špatný sex", "zas tolik se toho nestalo" nebo " proč to vůbec nahlašovala? Ublížila tak akorát sobě, dětem a rozvrátila rodinu" a jiné komentáře, které bagatelizují znásilnění tak třeba i domácí násilí a házejí vinu na oběť (victimblaming). Není to jen na internetu, ale obecně ve společnosti. Drtivá většina žen nejde znásilnění nahlásit. Jen 5%. Proč? Bojí se reakce své rodiny, okolí ale i toho, jak s nimi bude zacházet police nebo soud. Bohužel i soudy takové činy bagatelizují. Za držení většího množství marihuany zde dostaneš často větší trest, než za znásilnění, což je samo o sobě smutné.. Asi polovina případů nahlášených znásilnění zde končí podmíněným trestem a to často i brutálnější činy a za zneužívání dětí se podmíněné tresty dostávají ještě častěji! Je to v pořádku? Je v pořádku, aby pachatelům takových činů toto chování procházelo? Však ono se jim to dokonce vyplatí... Mnoho lidí si zde neuvědomuje, jak moc zraňující tyhle ohavné činy jsou.... Dokonce i v soudnictví.

Země, které jsi jmenoval s osvětou ohledně feminismu na tom také nebudou úplně nejlépe a v Polsku už vůbec ne. Tam jsou práva žen velmi upírána a vznikají tam dokonce zony "bez LGBT+". Pokud vím tak pedofily tam taky nemají moc rádi a význam pedofil a sexuální predátor zaměňují ještě víc, než tady v Česku. Na Slovensku na tom budou taky ještě hůře, než tady v Česku. Mám část rodiny ze Slovenska a ještě nedávno tam ženy byly brané jako něco méně než muž. Muž byl ten, co rozhodoval a žena měla být ta poslušná a věrná manželovi... Tedy minimálně v těch menších vesnicích. Když si tak před 15 lety koupila jedna moje příbuzná ze Slovenska rádio, měla z něj radost, ale musela ho jít nakonec vrátit, protože "pan alfasamec a hlava rodiny" zavelel a ještě jí vynadal.

Miloše Zemana má dnes už rádo opravdu jen málo lidí. Je to buran, který dokázal urazit koho mohl, vyjadřoval se sprostě... Ne, opravdu to nebyl nejlepší prezident a nezastupoval naší zemi nejlépe. Jsem ráda za nového prezidenta Petra Pavla. Věřím, že ten naší zemi bude reprezentovat dobře, stejně tak jako hájit naše zájmy a spíše spojovat, než rozdělovat.

Můžu tě ujistit, že MAP ani gay pocity rozhodně nevznikají z feminismu a to dokonce ani z toho extrémistického "feminismu". Je pouze možné, že pokud někdo předtím byl aspoň z části přitahován stejným pohlavím nebo dětmi, tak k nim mohl začít cítit větší náklonost (a nebo si jí spíše více uvědomovat), pokud se obklopoval nějakou špatnou sociální bublinou.

Pomoc i terapeuti v tvojí zemi určitě jsou. Nedávno jsem narazila na jeden nizozemský projekt pro pedofily. Zde mají stránky, kde je nejen odborná pomoc, ale i chat. Věřím, že tam najdeš pomoc a podporu.

https://pedofilie.nl/