Link: Virtuous Pedophiles - http://www.virped.org
"We do not choose to be attracted to children, and we cannot make that attraction go away. But we can resist the temptation to abuse children sexually, and many of us present no danger to children whatsoever. Yet we are despised for having a sexual attraction that we did not choose, cannot change, and successfully resist. This hatred has its consequences; many of us suffer from depression and sometimes even commit suicide. Paradoxically, the hatred actually increases the risk of child sexual abuse by making us afraid to admit our condition to others, thus discouraging us from seeking treatment. More of us could lead productive, happy, law-abiding lives if we could open up to people who would treat us not as monsters but as human beings with an unfortunate burden to bear.
The goals of our organization are to reduce the stigma attached to pedophilia by letting people know that a substantial number of pedophiles do not molest children, and to provide peer support and information about available resources to help pedophiles lead happy, productive lives. Our highest priority is to help pedophiles never abuse children. We hope you will explore our web site with an open mind."
Czech translation of the first paragraph here: http://www.pedofilie-info.cz/forum/viewtopic.php?f=16&p=6057#p6057
Virtuous Pedophiles website (www.virped.org)
-
Kasz
- Administrátor
- Líbí se mi: Dívky a ženy
- ve věku od: 4
- ve věku do: 28
- Kontakt: [email protected]
- Výkřik do tmy: Nejvíc mi vadí předsudečné odsouzení - i když jsem neublížil žádnému dítěti, najdou se lidé, co píšou "postavit ke zdi, kulka to vyřeší". Ne, nevyřeší. Pedofilové, kteří nic nespáchali, zažívají celý život zbytečné utrpení jen z důvodu předsudků. To je třeba změnit. Proto vznikl tenhle web.
- Příspěvky: 6598
- Dal: 1721 poděkování
- Dostal: 3601 poděkování
-
Kasz
- Administrátor
- Líbí se mi: Dívky a ženy
- ve věku od: 4
- ve věku do: 28
- Kontakt: [email protected]
- Výkřik do tmy: Nejvíc mi vadí předsudečné odsouzení - i když jsem neublížil žádnému dítěti, najdou se lidé, co píšou "postavit ke zdi, kulka to vyřeší". Ne, nevyřeší. Pedofilové, kteří nic nespáchali, zažívají celý život zbytečné utrpení jen z důvodu předsudků. To je třeba změnit. Proto vznikl tenhle web.
- Příspěvky: 6598
- Dal: 1721 poděkování
- Dostal: 3601 poděkování
Meet pedophiles who mean well (www.salon.com)
Meet pedophiles who mean well (http://www.salon.com)
The men behind VirtuousPedophiles.com are attracted to children but devoted to denying their desires
Nick Devin is a happily married man in his mid-60s with four grown children. “I have advanced degrees from prestigious universities, a very good job, a lot of friends and am well-respected in my community,” he writes on his Web site. “In short, I have a very good life.”
But he’s also a pedophile. While he experiences some attraction to adult women, he only fantasizes about pubescent boys — and none of his family or friends know. He says he’s never acted on his desires, though.
Devin is the co-founder of a new organization for men like himself: Virtuous Pedophiles. “We do not choose to be attracted to children, and we cannot make that attraction go away,” reads the group’s Web site. “But we can resist the temptation to abuse children sexually, and many of us present no danger to children whatsoever.” The goal of the organization is to offer support to pedophiles who want to live virtuously and to raise public awareness about the fact that such pedophiles exist.
It’s hard to know just how many there are of these “gold-star pedophiles,” as sex columnist Dan Savage calls them. James Cantor, a clinical psychologist and editor in chief of the scientific journal “Sexual Abuse,” says, “In my clinic, roughly half of the people who commit an offense against a child is pedophilic. We do not know, however, how many pedophiles there are who never commit any offenses and never come to our attention.” That’s because very few pedophiles will voluntarily out themselves, given the stigma; and due to mandatory reporting rules, which are open to interpretation, non-offending pedophiles can reasonably fear being reported to the police.
Ethan Edwards, the 57-year-old co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles, is attracted to girls as young as four and has sexual fantasies about them, but says he’s never abused a child. “I basically have no problem avoiding abusing anyone,” he told me. “That’s just not an issue. When I’m with a child, I’m attuned to her and could never lose sight of the danger to her of anything I did.”
Our conversation took place through Google chat because he feared that a telephone interview might expose his true identity. (Edwards is a pseudonym, and so is Devin.) Even still, he asked me to promise that I wouldn’t turn our chat over to “hacker types” who could determine who he is.
Edwards, who raised three daughters of his own but never experienced any attraction to them, says he would never cross that line, “even if there was a zero percent chance I would be caught,” because of the damage it could do to the child. His ultimate sexual fantasy takes place in an alternate universe of sorts where children can actually give meaningful consent.
Devin, who was himself sexually abused as a child, similarly explains his ability to resist his desires. “I recognize that sexual contact with a child can be harmful to the child, and I’ve always been firmly committed to making sure that nothing I do will ever harm a child,” he told me in an email. “I refuse to let my problem become someone else’s problem.” It doesn’t hurt that he’s “always had a very good life — lots of friends, close family, loving wife and children, academic accomplishments, athletic accomplishments, a good career.” There is too much to lose.
“My sexuality has never been the central part of my life,” says Devin. “It kind of remains in a box inside my head but never controls me, and I go about my life.”
Cantor believes that a group like Virtuous Pedophiles could help prevent child abuse. “It is hard to imagine someone who would feel more isolated than someone who recognizes he is sexually interested in children. In my experience, it is in those phases of greatest desperation that a pedophile is most likely to do something desperate, risking harm to a child,” he says. “Mutual support among people who share the same daily battle with their own desires can go a long way in addressing the extreme isolation, serving as a potential pressure valve, adding layer of protection, helping pedophiles to keep their behaviors under control.”
Support is a major aim of the site, beyond even raising awareness in the outside world. Devin and Edwards posted an anonymous plea on the site from a 20-year-old man struggling with attraction to young girls. “I wish with all my soul that I could have a brain that’s wired normally,” he writes, and goes on to explain that he’s scared of seeing a therapist for fear of being reported. “Even the friendships I have are in danger of falling apart because I can’t just keep saying ‘I’m fine,’ and I can’t talk to anyone about my problem. I think about suicide a lot.”
“Almost any group in the world can hold a convention, look out on a sea of faces, and say, ‘these are people like me,’” says Edwards. “We can’t.”
There is plenty of community to be found online for pedophiles who are not so adamant about the harmfulness of child abuse. The message board BoyChat is filled with justifications for adult-child sexual contact, and commenters recently caught on to the existence of Virtuous Pedophiles. “[T]his site promotes self-hate,” said one commenter. “Personally, not only do I find it offensive, it is quite slanted towards the idea that mutually willing sex with kids is harmful,” said another.
Devin doesn’t have much sympathy for this point of view. “The problem is that even if the pedophile thinks the kid is enjoying it at the time, he may be wrong. Remember, the pedophile is prejudiced here; he wants to think the kid is enjoying it. Moreover, even if the kid is enjoying it at the time, he can still be harmed.” He points to a case where a pedophile had sex with a kid and thought he was enjoying it. “A few years later, the kid jumped off a bridge.”
Edwards wants to shine a spotlight on the sort of pedophiles that don’t make the evening news. “I hope people start to realize that virtuous pedophiles exist,” he says, and “that many are no danger and shouldn’t be branded as dangerous without evidence.”
The men behind VirtuousPedophiles.com are attracted to children but devoted to denying their desires
Nick Devin is a happily married man in his mid-60s with four grown children. “I have advanced degrees from prestigious universities, a very good job, a lot of friends and am well-respected in my community,” he writes on his Web site. “In short, I have a very good life.”
But he’s also a pedophile. While he experiences some attraction to adult women, he only fantasizes about pubescent boys — and none of his family or friends know. He says he’s never acted on his desires, though.
Devin is the co-founder of a new organization for men like himself: Virtuous Pedophiles. “We do not choose to be attracted to children, and we cannot make that attraction go away,” reads the group’s Web site. “But we can resist the temptation to abuse children sexually, and many of us present no danger to children whatsoever.” The goal of the organization is to offer support to pedophiles who want to live virtuously and to raise public awareness about the fact that such pedophiles exist.
It’s hard to know just how many there are of these “gold-star pedophiles,” as sex columnist Dan Savage calls them. James Cantor, a clinical psychologist and editor in chief of the scientific journal “Sexual Abuse,” says, “In my clinic, roughly half of the people who commit an offense against a child is pedophilic. We do not know, however, how many pedophiles there are who never commit any offenses and never come to our attention.” That’s because very few pedophiles will voluntarily out themselves, given the stigma; and due to mandatory reporting rules, which are open to interpretation, non-offending pedophiles can reasonably fear being reported to the police.
Ethan Edwards, the 57-year-old co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles, is attracted to girls as young as four and has sexual fantasies about them, but says he’s never abused a child. “I basically have no problem avoiding abusing anyone,” he told me. “That’s just not an issue. When I’m with a child, I’m attuned to her and could never lose sight of the danger to her of anything I did.”
Our conversation took place through Google chat because he feared that a telephone interview might expose his true identity. (Edwards is a pseudonym, and so is Devin.) Even still, he asked me to promise that I wouldn’t turn our chat over to “hacker types” who could determine who he is.
Edwards, who raised three daughters of his own but never experienced any attraction to them, says he would never cross that line, “even if there was a zero percent chance I would be caught,” because of the damage it could do to the child. His ultimate sexual fantasy takes place in an alternate universe of sorts where children can actually give meaningful consent.
Devin, who was himself sexually abused as a child, similarly explains his ability to resist his desires. “I recognize that sexual contact with a child can be harmful to the child, and I’ve always been firmly committed to making sure that nothing I do will ever harm a child,” he told me in an email. “I refuse to let my problem become someone else’s problem.” It doesn’t hurt that he’s “always had a very good life — lots of friends, close family, loving wife and children, academic accomplishments, athletic accomplishments, a good career.” There is too much to lose.
“My sexuality has never been the central part of my life,” says Devin. “It kind of remains in a box inside my head but never controls me, and I go about my life.”
Cantor believes that a group like Virtuous Pedophiles could help prevent child abuse. “It is hard to imagine someone who would feel more isolated than someone who recognizes he is sexually interested in children. In my experience, it is in those phases of greatest desperation that a pedophile is most likely to do something desperate, risking harm to a child,” he says. “Mutual support among people who share the same daily battle with their own desires can go a long way in addressing the extreme isolation, serving as a potential pressure valve, adding layer of protection, helping pedophiles to keep their behaviors under control.”
Support is a major aim of the site, beyond even raising awareness in the outside world. Devin and Edwards posted an anonymous plea on the site from a 20-year-old man struggling with attraction to young girls. “I wish with all my soul that I could have a brain that’s wired normally,” he writes, and goes on to explain that he’s scared of seeing a therapist for fear of being reported. “Even the friendships I have are in danger of falling apart because I can’t just keep saying ‘I’m fine,’ and I can’t talk to anyone about my problem. I think about suicide a lot.”
“Almost any group in the world can hold a convention, look out on a sea of faces, and say, ‘these are people like me,’” says Edwards. “We can’t.”
There is plenty of community to be found online for pedophiles who are not so adamant about the harmfulness of child abuse. The message board BoyChat is filled with justifications for adult-child sexual contact, and commenters recently caught on to the existence of Virtuous Pedophiles. “[T]his site promotes self-hate,” said one commenter. “Personally, not only do I find it offensive, it is quite slanted towards the idea that mutually willing sex with kids is harmful,” said another.
Devin doesn’t have much sympathy for this point of view. “The problem is that even if the pedophile thinks the kid is enjoying it at the time, he may be wrong. Remember, the pedophile is prejudiced here; he wants to think the kid is enjoying it. Moreover, even if the kid is enjoying it at the time, he can still be harmed.” He points to a case where a pedophile had sex with a kid and thought he was enjoying it. “A few years later, the kid jumped off a bridge.”
Edwards wants to shine a spotlight on the sort of pedophiles that don’t make the evening news. “I hope people start to realize that virtuous pedophiles exist,” he says, and “that many are no danger and shouldn’t be branded as dangerous without evidence.”
Československá pedofilní komunita – již 13 let s Vámi! 
-
Kasz
- Administrátor
- Líbí se mi: Dívky a ženy
- ve věku od: 4
- ve věku do: 28
- Kontakt: [email protected]
- Výkřik do tmy: Nejvíc mi vadí předsudečné odsouzení - i když jsem neublížil žádnému dítěti, najdou se lidé, co píšou "postavit ke zdi, kulka to vyřeší". Ne, nevyřeší. Pedofilové, kteří nic nespáchali, zažívají celý život zbytečné utrpení jen z důvodu předsudků. To je třeba změnit. Proto vznikl tenhle web.
- Příspěvky: 6598
- Dal: 1721 poděkování
- Dostal: 3601 poděkování
Re: Virtuous Pedophiles website (www.virped.org)
Virtuous Peds? (http://www.ignitumtoday.com)
“My sexuality has never been the central part of my life,” says Devin. “It kind of remains in a box inside my head but never controls me, and I go about my life.”
These are sad and lonely words, the words of a man who admits to a lifelong sexual attraction to children. I read the pull quote above and assumed they were written by someone with “same-sex attraction.” I was shocked to discover that Salon.com was running a feature not on “chaste gays” but on “virtuous pedophiles.” What a concept: a class so feared and vilified is reaching out in an apparently positive way, and (more shocking) they can get coverage in a national outlet like that.
It will twist your brain in knots if you keep reading into the comments.
“I would like ask the question of what is normal … Homosexuality used to be stigmatised and called “the gay” like it is something you could catch.”
In the same vein, one of the men interviewed in the article itself says:
“Regarding the therapist, one of the problems we face is that we are scared of seeking out therapists, who may report us to authorities just for our feelings. Being ‘outed’ can be devastating. The second problem is that many therapists see us only as potential abusers and not as people who need to build a decent (celibate) life.”
“Outed”? Do they realize that they are using the exact same kind of rhetoric that the homosexual community used and continues to use? How does anyone not expect that one day pedophiles will receive exactly the same kind of acceptance that homosexuals are now enjoying? Return to the first commenter above and read it again.
While sites like anonymous go on crusades and shut down pedophile file-sharing sites today, at the same time the state of California is trying to illegalize SSA therapy for minors—they don’t want parents to “harm” their children by treating SSA as an illness. I won’t link to them, but the Salon article (or a quick google search) can point you in the direction of many completely open hubs for those with attractions to children. Normalcy is just whatever we get used to. “BoyLove” and “GirlLove” are just someone’s preference.
In the other corner, there are a number of commenters whose reaction to this article is both aghast and visceral. Many express a desire that all pedophiles be “cut up for parts” and similar expressions. Amidst the violent comments this calm woman caught my eye:
“I’m down on the idea of a public association for pedophiles. The existence of civil associations like this comes from a particular history of rights groups: they were organized by groups like gays, women, and people of color who were oppressed by society. But pedophiles are stigmatized, and rightly so, because sex acts with children is criminal and amoral.”
Is there a dichotomy here or what? A sex act with a child is criminal and immoral. Does this commenter know that, for now at least, the code which governs the behavior of military personnel forbids not only sodomy, but adultery as well? They are both crimes. Who decides that it stops at pedophilia?
Where does it end? For a Catholic reader, you could read this, walk away, think “eew” a little, and be done. After all, we’ve enjoyed reading blogs and essays recently by those with same-sex attraction, who discuss their sorrow at a condition they would rather not have—and we pray for their continued success in living a life of holiness. This sounds similar, right? Let’s pray for these people that they are helped to always be stronger than temptation.
But for the modern world, especially for the militant “tolerance” society of Western culture in general, they are twisting themselves in painful, tortuous contortions. Most want this to be wrong, to be wiped off the face of the earth, and many express violent and hateful thoughts toward pedophiles. But others get excited by the possibility of creating virtual (i.e. computer-generated) child pornography and making it widely available to those with sexual attractions to children, saying, “One criticism of ‘ordinary’ adult porn is that men come to prefer it to sex with real partners. That would be a fantastic result when it comes to child porn!” At this point, they have removed the rug from beneath their own feet by preaching tolerance, by refusing to accept the limits which wisdom and very long tradition had placed on sexual behavior.
Fundamentally, it all comes down to a lack of belief in chastity itself. No one can imagine being chaste, “waiting,” staying a virgin, celibacy, or even abstinence within marriage for any reason. If a gay person cannot imagine being chaste, no wonder they are repulsed by pedophiles—its assumed to be only a matter of time before they act on their inner tendencies. The entire contraception debate centers on a lack of belief in the idea of chastity—contraception is “preventative” precisely because no one can fathom persons simply, well, going without sex. (“Abstinence isn’t preventative, “ they say, “its imaginary.”)
What do you do in a world like this?
“My sexuality has never been the central part of my life,” says Devin. “It kind of remains in a box inside my head but never controls me, and I go about my life.”
These are sad and lonely words, the words of a man who admits to a lifelong sexual attraction to children. I read the pull quote above and assumed they were written by someone with “same-sex attraction.” I was shocked to discover that Salon.com was running a feature not on “chaste gays” but on “virtuous pedophiles.” What a concept: a class so feared and vilified is reaching out in an apparently positive way, and (more shocking) they can get coverage in a national outlet like that.
It will twist your brain in knots if you keep reading into the comments.
“I would like ask the question of what is normal … Homosexuality used to be stigmatised and called “the gay” like it is something you could catch.”
In the same vein, one of the men interviewed in the article itself says:
“Regarding the therapist, one of the problems we face is that we are scared of seeking out therapists, who may report us to authorities just for our feelings. Being ‘outed’ can be devastating. The second problem is that many therapists see us only as potential abusers and not as people who need to build a decent (celibate) life.”
“Outed”? Do they realize that they are using the exact same kind of rhetoric that the homosexual community used and continues to use? How does anyone not expect that one day pedophiles will receive exactly the same kind of acceptance that homosexuals are now enjoying? Return to the first commenter above and read it again.
While sites like anonymous go on crusades and shut down pedophile file-sharing sites today, at the same time the state of California is trying to illegalize SSA therapy for minors—they don’t want parents to “harm” their children by treating SSA as an illness. I won’t link to them, but the Salon article (or a quick google search) can point you in the direction of many completely open hubs for those with attractions to children. Normalcy is just whatever we get used to. “BoyLove” and “GirlLove” are just someone’s preference.
In the other corner, there are a number of commenters whose reaction to this article is both aghast and visceral. Many express a desire that all pedophiles be “cut up for parts” and similar expressions. Amidst the violent comments this calm woman caught my eye:
“I’m down on the idea of a public association for pedophiles. The existence of civil associations like this comes from a particular history of rights groups: they were organized by groups like gays, women, and people of color who were oppressed by society. But pedophiles are stigmatized, and rightly so, because sex acts with children is criminal and amoral.”
Is there a dichotomy here or what? A sex act with a child is criminal and immoral. Does this commenter know that, for now at least, the code which governs the behavior of military personnel forbids not only sodomy, but adultery as well? They are both crimes. Who decides that it stops at pedophilia?
Where does it end? For a Catholic reader, you could read this, walk away, think “eew” a little, and be done. After all, we’ve enjoyed reading blogs and essays recently by those with same-sex attraction, who discuss their sorrow at a condition they would rather not have—and we pray for their continued success in living a life of holiness. This sounds similar, right? Let’s pray for these people that they are helped to always be stronger than temptation.
But for the modern world, especially for the militant “tolerance” society of Western culture in general, they are twisting themselves in painful, tortuous contortions. Most want this to be wrong, to be wiped off the face of the earth, and many express violent and hateful thoughts toward pedophiles. But others get excited by the possibility of creating virtual (i.e. computer-generated) child pornography and making it widely available to those with sexual attractions to children, saying, “One criticism of ‘ordinary’ adult porn is that men come to prefer it to sex with real partners. That would be a fantastic result when it comes to child porn!” At this point, they have removed the rug from beneath their own feet by preaching tolerance, by refusing to accept the limits which wisdom and very long tradition had placed on sexual behavior.
Fundamentally, it all comes down to a lack of belief in chastity itself. No one can imagine being chaste, “waiting,” staying a virgin, celibacy, or even abstinence within marriage for any reason. If a gay person cannot imagine being chaste, no wonder they are repulsed by pedophiles—its assumed to be only a matter of time before they act on their inner tendencies. The entire contraception debate centers on a lack of belief in the idea of chastity—contraception is “preventative” precisely because no one can fathom persons simply, well, going without sex. (“Abstinence isn’t preventative, “ they say, “its imaginary.”)
What do you do in a world like this?
Československá pedofilní komunita – již 13 let s Vámi!
-
Kasz
- Administrátor
- Líbí se mi: Dívky a ženy
- ve věku od: 4
- ve věku do: 28
- Kontakt: [email protected]
- Výkřik do tmy: Nejvíc mi vadí předsudečné odsouzení - i když jsem neublížil žádnému dítěti, najdou se lidé, co píšou "postavit ke zdi, kulka to vyřeší". Ne, nevyřeší. Pedofilové, kteří nic nespáchali, zažívají celý život zbytečné utrpení jen z důvodu předsudků. To je třeba změnit. Proto vznikl tenhle web.
- Příspěvky: 6598
- Dal: 1721 poděkování
- Dostal: 3601 poděkování
Re: Virtuous Pedophiles website (www.virped.org)
I wrote this first-contact email to Virtuous Pedophiles:
Dear Virtuous Pedophiles,
we have found your interesting website. In 2010 we founded website http://www.pedofilie-info.cz, which is primarily information website about pedophilia, then also community website for pedophiles, we have also internet Advisory centre for pedophiles, where three Czech sexologist give their answers for anonymous inquiries. Few months ago we translated some parts of our web to English language, we have also English section on our forum. Our objectives are the very same as yours. Some of us go to sexological conferencies and tells their personal stories directly to proffesionals. If you are interested, we can exchange experiences and also I would ask you, if we can provide link to your website on our website in link section.
We wish you all the best and good new year 2013.
Yours sincerely,
Petr Kasz
administrator of http://www.pedofilie-info.cz
email: [email protected]
Dear Virtuous Pedophiles,
we have found your interesting website. In 2010 we founded website http://www.pedofilie-info.cz, which is primarily information website about pedophilia, then also community website for pedophiles, we have also internet Advisory centre for pedophiles, where three Czech sexologist give their answers for anonymous inquiries. Few months ago we translated some parts of our web to English language, we have also English section on our forum. Our objectives are the very same as yours. Some of us go to sexological conferencies and tells their personal stories directly to proffesionals. If you are interested, we can exchange experiences and also I would ask you, if we can provide link to your website on our website in link section.
We wish you all the best and good new year 2013.
Yours sincerely,
Petr Kasz
administrator of http://www.pedofilie-info.cz
email: [email protected]
-
Tabitha
- Registrovaný uživatel
- Bydliště: Seattle
- Líbí se mi: Dívky
- ve věku od: 10
- ve věku do: 11
- Výkřik do tmy: I am custodian of Tabitha Church
- Příspěvky: 136
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- Dostal: 6 poděkování
Re: Virtuous Pedophiles website (www.virped.org)
Virtuous Pedophiles is a splinter group born out of http://b4uact.org/
Thank you Kasz, for setting a prime example of good will. Very admirable, I wish to fashion my own character in your likeness.
Thank you Kasz, for setting a prime example of good will. Very admirable, I wish to fashion my own character in your likeness.
-
Kasz
- Administrátor
- Líbí se mi: Dívky a ženy
- ve věku od: 4
- ve věku do: 28
- Kontakt: [email protected]
- Výkřik do tmy: Nejvíc mi vadí předsudečné odsouzení - i když jsem neublížil žádnému dítěti, najdou se lidé, co píšou "postavit ke zdi, kulka to vyřeší". Ne, nevyřeší. Pedofilové, kteří nic nespáchali, zažívají celý život zbytečné utrpení jen z důvodu předsudků. To je třeba změnit. Proto vznikl tenhle web.
- Příspěvky: 6598
- Dal: 1721 poděkování
- Dostal: 3601 poděkování
Re: Virtuous Pedophiles website (www.virped.org)
Answer for my email:
Hi Kasz,
Thanks for your email. We would be happy to have you link to our group and exchange information. We assume you also operate from the basic premise that sexual contact between children and adults is always wrong.
Hi Kasz,
Thanks for your email. We would be happy to have you link to our group and exchange information. We assume you also operate from the basic premise that sexual contact between children and adults is always wrong.
Československá pedofilní komunita – již 13 let s Vámi!